The Thief and His Dragon
by oblivious fantasizer
Summary: Alfred F. Jones - expert thief and the most wanted man in all of the three kingdoms; the Hearts, Clubs and Spades - wishes he never stole from that creepy dude with the huge eyebrows. Eventual USUK.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1: Robbed**

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><p>Alfred burst into the room and closed the behind him, pausing to listen if the bang alerted the other two residents in the mansion and after a few minutes, he slumped over with a sigh.<p>

He straightened and surveyed the room.

Alfred never really got a chance to see the office for himself, Vash kinda skipped over it during the tour around the mansion. The wallpaper was creamy; Lili's father must have smoked since the wallpaper was a shade darker than it was behind the portraits and bookshelves. The massive window at the back of the room took the role as being the wall, with rich, brown, velvet curtains flowed down either side of it, wafting in the timid breeze that slipped through the sliver of the opened window.

Outside Alfred could see the stables and the main gates, with a grainy path that led you down a hill and out of the Zwingli's property. In front of that stood a huge desk, slick, brown and shiny from care and polish, with an elegant gold oil lamp placed neatly in the top corner. A comfy looking chair, so comfy that it almost tempted Alfred to sit on and lay back for a while, sat behind the desk.

In the corner there was what looked like a safe that required a key to be opened…_damn._

Nothing else was on this desk, no pens lying about, nor were there any bits of paper or any sorts of things that would be found on a common desk present. Everything was cleared away, not Alfred expected it any different; he doubted anyone would use it in the future anymore; the reason it was kept this way and not changed into another bedroom or storage room or something was because the Zwingli's kept this place the way it was in memory of their father.

Curious, Alfred rounded around the desk and pulled out a drawer and was surprised to find it full to the neck with documents stacked and stuffed inside. Seemed Alfred was wrong in his deduction; apparently the Zwingli's were determined to keep the place _exactly _the way it was before their father died.

Slowly, he took a hold of the handle and slid the drawer out, placing it atop the shiny desk. He pulled the documents out from inside the drawer to see if there was anything else in there. When there was nothing interesting to be found, he pulled out all the rest of the drawers out and dumped them and their documents onto the floor.

Nothing.

Huffing, the blond shoved the chair out of the way, at this point not caring when it toppled over with the force of his push, and crouched to look underneath the desk for little, secret compartments. As he expected, in the left side underneath the desk was a part that jutted out just slightly. Carefully, Alfred tucked is fingers under the piece of wood and tugged it down until the lid opened.

Inside a small key was sitting there innocently.

Alfred paused.

He looked at the corner of the room where safe sat just as innocently.

He grinned.

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><p>"Alfie~!" A chirpy voice rang throughout the corridors, followed by giggling and the click-clack of heels tapping on a marbled floor in a hurried behaviour. "Where are you?!" the voice called once more, the owner of the voice soon rounded one of the mansion's many corners, the bottom of her pale, yellow summer dress swishing at the movement of her knees, and made her way towards her father's office.<p>

She giggled once more, twirling a short blonde strand of hair around her index finger thoughtfully; hide and seek; it brought back so many memories from her childhood. Though she found it odd that her soon-to-be-husband, a grown man, would want to play such a game (it was childish, even for him), she had no qualms over it.

She felt a bit guilty for peeking as she was counting to see what direction he would go. She had lived in this mansion for _years: _the direction he went only had 3 rooms in that wing of the mansion: the master bedroom, a storage room and her deceased father's office, she had already checked the first two locations.

She had met her dear fiancée just a month ago, during the festival her kingdom's ruler had hosted in celebration of driving their rivalling country back out their borders; the Clubs. She had no one to dance with and had gone to sit at one of the tables that were laid out for those who were weary and those who dance till their feet ached when a charming young handsome man with an equally charming flick in his blonde hair had shyly offered her to be his dance partner, his deeps blue eyes sparkling with enquiry.

At that moment Lili knew it was love at first sight.

One thing had lead to another, and the next thing they knew they were engaged, soon to be married; it felt almost surreal.

She reached for the golden handle slowly, a playful grin growing on her face and broadening her cheeks as she imagined the look on his face when she discovers him. With that thought in mind, she grasped and twisted the cold doorknob and swung the door open in one, fluid motion. She opened her mouth to gleefully shout "Found you!" as soon as the door fully opened, however, the sight before her had her frozen her solid.

The place was in _shambles_, ransacked, and utterly _destroyed_. The drawers that were usually neatly tucked into her father's dark polished desk had been thrown out and emptied savagely, documents, letters and all sorts of similar items were strewn about the carpet; some had been stepped on and crumpled. Her gaze landed on the lonesome safe that stood proudly in the corner, she was horrified to find the safe door…open.

Lili had clutched onto the doorknob to keep herself steady as her horror developed tenfold – everything, everything was _gone_. Hr mother's jewellery, the items she collected as a child, her father's watch, wallet, favourite cigar pipe, and all of the gold coin purses that took up all of the safe's space.

Her deep green eyes, suddenly wet, gravitated towards the French windows at the back of the room, behind the desk, and dully noted that one of them was cracked open just enough for someone to slip through, enough for a _male _to slip through. Her first instinct was not to believe it; that all this was just a sick dream. But there was no denying who the culprit was. Her eyes landed onto the note on the desk, folded in half so it could stand up unaided.

She screamed.

On the note it read;

_Thanks for the early wedding present, sweetheart!_

_Lots of love_

_Alfie_

_XXX_

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><p>Alfred flinched when he heard the banshee-like scream. The sharp, shrilly sound penetrated his ears and caught him off guard, causing his hands to lose their grip on the coarse bricks, jutting out just enough to scale down, and fell in an ungraceful heap. A small, surprised yelp barely managed to escape him before the hard ground knocked the wind out of him.<p>

He laid there in a daze, watching the clouds lazily roll by his vision with a faraway look in his eyes until an arrow slammed into the ground just beside his ear; successfully snapping him out of his reverie. Alfred whipped his head up to look up at the window he just climbed out of, and there stood Vash, Lili's big brother, with a crossbow pointing straight at him.

Alfred scrambled up to his feet, sun-dried dirt flying in his haste, and ran. He snatched up the sack full of goods and his surprisingly unscathed wired glasses that had fallen off during its owner's fall. The thief sprinted towards the stables; the only cover he had against the maniac that was currently roaring obscurities, most likely shouting in his home language, and shooting arrows constantly at poor Alfred in a blind rage.

Alfred skidded in behind the safety of the stables and flattened himself against its wood. He panted as blood pounded in his ears, chest heaving as his heart threatened to break out of its rib cage; how the hell was he supposed to get out of here without leaving looking like a pincushion? _Was he even there? _Alfred didn't like the idea of Vash coming downstairs and outside when equipped with a loaded crossbow. Swallowing, he cautiously, slowly peeked around the corner, and immediately recoiled back as approximately three arrows whizzed by. The only success they had of was taking a couple strands of blond hair with them.

_How was this guy even shooting from this angle?!_ The thief dug into his back pocket and pulled out a pocket-sized mirror and slanted it until he could see the side of the mansion…and was terrified to see the brother hanging outside the window, in the midst of climbing down with his eyes and crossbow in one hand trained in the thief's direction.

_Holy shit!_ Alfred nearly dropped his mirror as he struggled to slide it back into his pocket again and scrambled away from the corner. He frantically rummaged around his brain for what could be an ideal escape and could reduce the chances of getting shot in the balls.

He jumped when he felt something tugged at the tenacious flick in his hair; he leaned out of reach and twisted his torso around to see who the culprit was.

He blinked when he came face to face with a horse, a white horse to be exact, chewing absentmindedly on hay as it eyed Alfred with a bored expression. Alfred stared right back at it with bewilderment as he suddenly recognized where he had seen the mare before.

"_So this is your horse, huh?"_

_Lili grinned and nodded, she released his hand which she had just previously been tugging to guide him to the stables, and turned to gaze at the said horse._

"_Yes, my daddy bought him for me when I was a little girl - on my tenth birthday I think – he was the owners' fastest; He's won me a lot of medal and rosettes in the past." _

_Alfred raised an eyebrow and looked at the ashen mare which in turn merely glanced at him before burying its head into its bucket to continue on eating, "really?"_

_Lili's smile faltered as she caught what he meant. She sighed, "I know it's hard to believe, but…" She turned to him and smiled weakly, "she's a really great horse." _

A light bulb metaphorically appeared above Alfred's head; of course, this was his ticket outta here!

Alfred grinned and reached for the lock to the horse's stable.

Vash growled as he watched the little shit duck out of view behind the stables, _the coward! _He internally hissed. The man frowned, after firing those shoots there's no way Jones would come back out from cover, Jones was an idiot but even an idiot will know when they're in a life threatening situation. Vash smirked; he had the element of surprise on his side.

He landed onto the ground, expertly bending his knees and straightened, crossbow pointed in at the stables and silently made his over.

However, the sound of horse's hooves caused him to whirl around and watched gob-smacked as Jones came from the other side of the stables, riding Lili's horse and took off to down the hill …it wasn't until Jones disappeared down the hill did Vash snap out of his stupor realized he had been outsmarted by _Alfred Fucking Jones; _his fury was indescribable.

"_JOOOOOOONNNNNNNES!"_

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><p>Alfred hissed as he slowed the horse to a leisure pace the moment they were a generous distance away from the mansion, biting down on his bottom lip hard and took deep breaths, tears forming at the corner of his eyes; riding a horse bare-back was <em>never<em> a good idea. He shifted to find at least gain some comfort on his perch, yet no avail. He'd just have to grit his teeth and bare it for the next couple of miles.

He plucked out leaves from his hair, caught during his escape as he got whacked in the face by some low branches when descending down the hill. He frowned at his ruined trousers, the knees scuffed and stained by dirt _and_ _I loved those ones too, they were so comfy! _

Alfred grumbled and unbuttoned his use-to-be pristine white dress shirt that had dirt covered all over his back, till his collarbone was visible; the sun was making Alfred sweat under its heat. He lifted a hand to rub at the space between his eyebrows in a flimsy attempt to rid of the sudden ache there.

Lili will be number five on the steadily growing list, at this rate by the time it's winter he'll be making snow angels not out of snow but _gold…_ Somehow that pun didn't make Alfred as amused as he thought it would. Then again, never has the aftermath of a successful theft ever made him jolly, it made him ashamed and bitter with guilt.

All this, the stealing, started when he was just twelve years old, standing in front of a bakery with his mouth watering at the sight of cakes, pies and all other types of delicious food that were made in that wonderful place through the glass window. His only problem back then was that he didn't any coins to buy anything; he spotted a little girl across the street, roughly his age with curls in her hair, wearing a cute and really expensive frock, holding a small bag strapped over her shoulder. Alfred had walked to her, had said hello and gave her a seemingly innocent hug which she eagerly returned back, unbeknownst of his hand sneaking into her bag and taking the purse inside. He held it behind his back as he stepped back and waved cheerfully as he walked backwards to the shop.

It wasn't until the next day her father came round to the orphanage and beat him up in the middle of the street for everyone to see.

Alfred's heart leaped when he heard thunderous rattling, the sound breaking him out his reminiscing and a shuddering breath escaped him - god, he was so on edge - as he discovered the noise came from a carriage that had just rolled past him, pulled along its rickety wheels by two horses as it bounced and jiggled unsteadily on the uneven dirt path, he stared at the coachman enviously as he eyed the seat the man sat in, a seat that was most defiantly more comfortable than riding on a horse's bare back. As soon as the clatter of wooden wheels dimmed into a soft murmur, the thief was pulled back into his thoughts again.

He always felt like this after he committed crime, ultra-paranoid that his victims' brother or father or –hell - even a guard would sneak up on him and catch him. He couldn't afford to be caught.

He was Alfred F. Jones, thief extraordinaire, most wanted man in all of the three kingdoms; the Hearts, Diamonds and Spades.

The only reason he's not wanted in the Clubs region is because he doubt he'd even be able to board a ship to get there; the guards would recognize him immediately

He is a criminal wanted for taking advantage of young women's naivety in order to steal their belongings and along the way break the poor women's unfortunate heart. That's what his wanted posters said anyway (which he came across a _lot_); Alfred had guessed by naivety meaning forming a relationship with a woman and gains their trust for them to invite him to her house, resulting into him stealing their stuff.

Alfred never enjoyed the act of hurting some girl's feelings, but he needed money to survive and they needed to be taught that people can be right shrewd, selfish bastards when they wanted to be, girls like Lili had to be taught that not everyone is like their family or friends and they need to know what some people can be capable of doing.

He saved these girls, though not directly and most certainly not in an agreeable way. But it got the message across bluntly that they shouldn't trust strangers so easily.

Alfred hunched over, sighed and rubbed his face.

But it didn't make him stop feeling like shit about it.

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><p>AN: My first time writing, so apologises if this seems a bit crap. No promises on updating, as I've not really thought of anything to continue this, I'm kinda wanting you guys to come up with some plotlines I could possibly write for this. Anyhow, hoped you enjoyed of what little I've done XD and if you have any cool ideas, please let me know! (^W^)

Cheers.

-OB


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: Diamonds**

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><p>As soon as the gates to the city came into view, he swung himself off his horse, stumbling as he landed on his feet unsteadily; his poor butt cheeks. First thing to get as soon as he steps into the city is to purchase a saddle, because he was <em>not <em>going to ride a horse bareback _ever again_.

He bent down stiffly to pick up his sack that he had dropped onto the ground, swinging it heavily over his shoulder and took the horse's reins to tug said horse up to the stable at the side of the entrance. As he tied the reins securely to the post, he caught the horse's eyes just as he finished the knot and an idea popped in his head.

"You need a name," Alfred said thoughtfully as he reached over to dust the horse's inky hair away from its dark eyes. He eyed it considerately as it blinked its long lashes at him sluggishly - as if bored - wracking his brain for a suitable name; something unique, cool and _totally badass_.

"Freedom," he decided and at the name, the horse – _Freedom _seemed to perk up, her bored, dull eyes suddenly brightening with her ears standing to attention. Alfred chuckled and patted Freedom's neck, "you like that, huh?" The soft snort he received from the now perky mare was an affirmative. Alfred smiled, "I guess it's better than _Mrs. Sparkles,_ am I right?"

He got the hem of his shirt nibbled on for that.

Freeing his shirt, he patted Freedom's one more time and stepped back, "you stay here for the time being, I won't be long." He said, "You can, uh…" He glanced over the mare's shoulder to see three other horses, owlishly staring as they chewed around the hay in their mouths. "You can chat with those guys while I'm away, 'kay?" Without waiting for any form of an answer, he hoisted the sack he previously set down up over his shoulder and he entered the city.

The guards - adorned in their national colours - standing sentinel on both sides of the gate eyed him as he walked passed them, no doubt taking in his scruffy appearance. However they didn't seem to recognize him going by the fact they didn't stop him. _Good, _the thief thought as he continued under the gates, eyeing the sharp points above his head as he passed.

_It'll make my life sooooo much easier._

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><p>The Kingdom of Diamonds was well known for its luck in gems, as in nearly every village, town or city there will always be a mine overflowing with diamonds, gold, rubies and other types of rare gems.<p>

That's why some people believe the reason it's called The Kingdom of Diamonds is due to the kingdom gaining most of their wealth and success from mining for gold and gems, especially diamonds. Because of the wealth of the economy they were able to craft such unique techniques in jewellery, weapons, furniture and – heck - even new inventions. Last time Alfred heard, they were planning on making a ship that would sail through the air. _Through the air!_

Its national colours are based on the amount of gold the Diamonds relay and use in not only for jewellery, but also in their industries. For example, the metal is used in their buildings, bridges and ships.

Hence why most of the place has the yellow national flags and banners everywhere. Not to mention the place has a _yellow _brick road and _yellow _houses with _yellow _doors along with – you get the point.

The Diamond's capital in Alfred's opinion is that it's too flashy, gaudy and too _yellow_; the two attributes that also illustrates the kingdom's beloved king, Francis Bonnefoy, a real fruit cake to say at least. Alfred has nothing against the colour of yellow (despite the fact it's the same colour as pee), it's just the kingdom uses too much of it. Everywhere you turned, yellow stared right back you.

He tore his eyes away from the monstrosity of eyesores and slid the sack from his shoulder - which was beginning to ache from the weight it was burdened with - and gave the overworked appendage a good rub to rid the soreness. Alfred wasn't here for tourism, he needed food, water, not necessarily weapons but hey you never know, a _saddle_ and a good night's sleep before he hit the road the again…the only problem is that he has no clue where his next destination was. He scratched his head then shrugged nonchalantly; it'll come to him during his hunt for an inn.

He was just about to do that when someone bumped into him, books spilling from the person's hands from the impact. He couldn't see their face due to the hood of their cloak

"Oh shi!- oh jeez I am_ so sorry I_ - no! No! Don't - please! I'll pick it up it's okay - my fault my bad!" Quickly dumping his sack onto the ground, he dropped onto his knees and scrambled to collect all the books scattered across the ground within his reach before the other person did.

Finally collecting them in his arms, he looked up to the owner of the books to apologize when-

_Holy shit._

Alfred had probably seen the most greenest, beautiful eyes he had ever seen. He'd would bet a hundred - no, a_ thousand_ coins that they were even greener than an_ emerald_.

Man, they look like they _glowed._

Alfred didn't realize he was staring until the person cleared their throat, breaking him out of his reverie.

The person's voice sounded male - it was hard to tell with their face being obscured by the shadow of their hood - "well? Are you going to give me my books back, or are you just going to sit there like a idiotic git and continue making a scene?"

Confused, the thief looked around and was mortified to see the other townspeople staring at the two of them. God damn that was embarrassing. _  
><em>

Wincing, he handed the stack of books to the cloaked man and stood up, he was shocked to see that this dude only came up to his collarbone.

_Oh god this guy is tiny!_

The little man looked up at him and glared at him from underneath the hood of his cloak, "what did you say?"

His eyes seemed to have glow brighter.

Crap, did he say that out loud?

"Nothing." He quickly said, taking a couple steps back to pick up his sack of goods to sling over his shoulder. Looking around, the onlooking citizens seemed to have lost interest and were paying more attention to the stalls surrounding the city square.

"Hey, uh..." He rubbed the back of his neck, feeling awkward, "you wouldn't happen to know where to find an inn here?"

The green eyed man blinked owlishly at him a couple of times, before the line of his mouth curved into a small smile, Alfred felt his face burn, "A newcomer then, are you?" He asked slyly.

Alfred laughed nervously, his face was going red wasn't it. "Yeah, I'm kind of a newbie here so...yeah newcomer." The fucker's smile seemed to become even wider.

"Well then," he turned - his cloak following the movement swiftly - and pointed north, in the direction where the road headed straight to where the castle was. "Continue down there, until you reach the inn called 'The Red Tomato'. "

_What? _Alfred thought disbelievingly, he eyed the cloaked man doubtfully"_Red Tomato? _Really?"

Seeing his point, the man just shrugged, "don't be fooled by the lackluster name; at least the owner will offer you a room which doesn't resemble a stable." Guess he had a point too.

Alfred turned to the hooded man, "well thanks for that - oh! And sorry for...y'know, for making you drop all your books like that." He rubbed his arm sheepishly.

A chuckle caused his head to snap up.

"Don't worry about it." Alfred could just make out that sweet smile on the dude's face, and before he turned to leave, Alfred called out.

"Hey! wait! what's your name!"

The cloaked man turned around slowly.

"It's Arthur"

And with that, he was gone.

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><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong>

Dearie me, sorry for the long wait folks. Sorry if I took so long, exams y'know. (^_^)

Anyho, hopefully you guys liked this more than I did. I feel like I could've done more but oh well! Feedback will be lovely, it makes my days more sunnier!

Also, I'd love to encourage you guys to give me more ideas on what might happen in the next chapter or later on - because I've only made the skeleton for the next chapter and it would be lovely for you guys to give me some help in fleshing it out and maybe give me some more ideas for the next upcoming chapters.

See you next time my lovelies! \(^O^)/

(Has this chapter been too short? PLEASE LET ME KNOW :S)

-oblivious fantasizer

xxxx


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